Monday, August 4, 2008

Get what you want - every time...

Sail through all kinds of sticky situations with several tips on being more assertive...

  • keep it simple : 'just be direct!' urges Deborah May, an executive coach. Talking too much seems 'indecisive and wishy-washy'. People get confused by lots of words and the message gets lost. State your request simply and without apologising (according to one study, women do three times more often than men). She says, 'women use 'sorry' as a gap filler, but men can interpret this to mean you're always making mistakes.'

  • get serious : smiling is the worst thing you can do when you're angry. Deborah May says, 'it's confusing and undermines your credibility'. Women often smile while delivering bad news to soften the blow. Meanwhile, if someone flies off the handle, remember that ' the power is in staying calm' and not interupting. Many women confuse being assertive with being angry, and their response can quickly escalate from submissive to aggressive.

  • be honest : 'don't make execuses'. As soon as you start doing that, your boss will start trying solve your problems for your. Instead, as Deborah May recommends, 'calmly explaining you're unavailable and offeirng alternative solution to the problem. If your boss insistent, a good trick is simply repeat that you're not available - without making any execuses or apologies as to why you can't do what he/she wants you to do...

it's worthwhile to try them when facing such sittuations...

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